Thomas
Thomas J. DeMarinis passed away peacefully at his home in Rancho Palos Verdes, CA, December 18, 2009, after a two year battle with lung cancer. Born April 4, 1941 in Brooklyn, NY, to John and Dorothy DeMarinis. A Chemical Engineer, Tom was a 1964 graduate of NY Polytechnic Institute who was employed in the industrial chemical field for 34 years. After his retirement in 1998 he took up tennis and golf. A perfectionist by nature, he would take lessons and practice faithfully, become frustrated, swear he was going to quit then have a "break through" to keep him at it. Tennis was his passion whether playing or watching the tournaments. He also took up biking and hiking. Tom completed a ten week survival course with the Sierra Club and later would join them hiking and summit local peaks in Southern California. When it came to professional sports, he was the quintessential baseball fan quoting stats and players. Tom learned to tolerate great pain as a devoted NY Met fan. We can be sure he is interceding with the Lord to help them build their bullpen and get some pitching. His mantra was, the game is all about pitching. Tom is survived by his wife, Carol, his brother Theodore and his wife, Maureen, nephews Andrew and John DeMarinis, nieces Dorothy Riggio and Danielle Gallagher along with great nieces and great nephews Angelina and Teddy DeMarinis and Xavier and Mary Riggio. A memorial service in Thomas' honor will be held early Spring 2010 at Good Shepherd Church in Brooklyn, NY. Contributions in Tom's memory may be made to National Lung Cancer Partnership [ nationallungcancerpartnership.org ] and SPCA of Los Angeles [ spcala.com ].

View current weather.

Memories Timeline

View the Timeline

Guestbook

  1. Tom, You will last eternally as we remember your great influence, your calm words, your patience as we terrorized the neighborhood and your Triumph Bonneville 750… All our love! Mike, Gay, Rachael and Allie

  2. Tom, Frank and I will miss all the wonderful times we had together. What happy memories. You will always be in our heart and prayers. Love You, Shirley and Frank

  3. Tom was a dear friend and I real truly miss him. My prayers go out to his lovely wife Carol who is also a dear friend of mine. We can rest assure that Tom is with the Lord and he’s doing just fine. We will celebrate his new life in heaven. Love you Tom & Carol Keith

  4. Dear Carol, family and friends of Tom. Bill and I extend our heartful sympathy to all of you who were fortunate to know and love this very special man. He shall be missed by many and long remembered as a wonderful, loving, caring and fun man. Our prayers continue for you all, and Carol especially, in this time of sadness and loss. Please remember that we are here for you, Carol, and anything you may need or want. Our love and peace to you.

  5. Carol, We are happy we had an opportunity to spend time with you and Tom in October. Although Tom was not up to his usual happy self he did seem to enjoy the time together. We were lucky to have you as our next-door neighbor in Matteson when the boys were growing up. they loved Tom and you. Still do Our friendship grew close as neighbors and continued to grow as the years passed even though we were always miles apart. We always felt more as family than friends. Remember, we are always here for you. Love, Jim and Jo

  6. Dear Carol, We are so happy to have met you and Tom and to become friends in such a short time. Tom will be truly missed. all are love.

  7. Carol, It is so difficult to write words to explain our feelings of sympathy. You have been so very strong & you both were very brave through Tom’s illness. As we all know being a caregiver is a difficult task. For sure Tom is in a better place now. Resting with no pain. Thank God for that. Now you need to remain strong & carry on. All your family & friends are here to help you if you need. All you need do is ask. We love you & continue praying for Tom, you & all the family. With big hugs.. Love, Cousins Carol & Kevin

  8. Dearest Carol, We are deeply sadden by the passing of our beloved friend/Uncle Tom. We take comfort by the many, many wonderful memories we have of you and Tom and hold them near and dear in our hearts. We love you and are here for you always. Love Bill, Doris, Cristina and Eric

  9. Carol, Although I never met Tom, I can tell that he was a great guy (even if he was a Mets fan. He will be their angel in the bull pen). May you be comforted by all the love and support of your family and friends. You have been in my prayers for God’s strength and peace during this time. The memories of all the good times will keep a smile in your heart forever. Be blessed and comforted.

  10. Uncle Thomas is my Godfather a solid influence throughout my life.As I walk his neighborhood here in Brooklyn many times I am stopped by his friends most I do not even know, Let me tell you they always laugh when sharing memories of my uncle Tom. Stories of runnimg down the ally way,His old friend Mr.Dillion as I know him, still talks of the old school days Always, Always I hear how Uncle Tom took the time to know a person and his gift of great understanding and clarity in all topics whatever,it can be baseball,politics anything. My Uncle Tom is a Great gentle man.We all love him. Just as I write this I explain to my son Ted why I am visiting this site,He would like for everyone to remember how Uncle Tom played duck,duck goose with him. Ted was 3 years old at the time,We are at opposite coasts, no matter Uncle Tom is a big influence in the lives of my family.

  11. Tom was a true professional and gentleman. Once in a great while we have the good fortune to work with someone who truely touch us and really enjoy working with. Tom was such a person for me. He will truely be missed. Les howe Construction Consultant Rhodia,Retired May the lord comfort you Carol.

  12. Carol, We will miss our dear friend,Tom.There are so many wonderful memories of him that we will cherish especially the laughter and the tears that we shared. Tom was never a quitter whether it was in chess, on the tennis court or fighting for his own life. May the good Lord give you strength and peace. You have our love and friendship forever. Mary Ann and Vince

  13. Dear Aunt Carol, During Uncle Thomas’ last days, I intended to write him a letter, and was going to ask you to read it to him. I never finished it. I want to share with you, and all that loved him, what I had started writing. Dear Uncle Thomas, I am so proud to have been your neice. Each call and visit we shared, you genuinely listened, and gave good advice. Even though we had so many miles between us, you always made it so easy to pick right up where we left off, and reconnect. I always felt so proud that you were such an acomplished engineer. While I was growing up, I often thought of your accomplishments which motivated me to seek out more for myself. You are such a kind, articulate and polite gentelman. I have so many fond memories of you. Some of my favorites were listening to you read the letters you wrote to Grandma and Grandpa when you first began your career, watching the Olympics together during one of my visits, helping me get through my first California sunburn and most of all my three way telephone conversations with you and Aunt Carol. You always made me feel important and special. Thank you so much for loving me and being my dear Uncle Thomas.

  14. Our family’s thoughts and prayers are with you. I have fond memories of visiting Tom and Carol during a vacation trip to LA over twenty years ago. Very truly, Larry Domenico (Bill’s oldest son)

  15. I only met Tom once and that was at your wedding. I did get a chance to speak to him recently while you were out. We had such a nice conversation that afterwards I thought he was the kind of person I wished I could get to know better. Unfortunately time was not on his side. May God bless him, and bless you for all the wonderful care you gave Tom.

  16. I worked with Tom at the chemical plant in Carson from when he first came to California up until he retired early at the age of 57. I always enjoyed working with Tom and his dedication to the job was surpassed by no one. No matter how early I would come to the office Tom was already there. I am glad that Tom retired early so that he was able to pursue some non work activities such as golf, tennis, hiking, etc. He deserved it!

  17. I walked into the Carson Stauffer plant the day before Thanksgiving in 1986 and asked Precious if I could talk with the technical manager for a few minutes. Tom took me on a plant tour, we dined at the roach coach and 4 hours later he was telling me how to transfer to the site. Seven month hence Tom was my boss and mentor. We worked together as a teacher and student until I tranfered to Martinez in 1992. I have since progressed to plant manager of two sites with the help of the foundation Tom provided. At times when we are discussing the enterprise organization, we emphasize the need for a technical manager and Tom’s name is brought up as the role model for the position. I feel very priviledged to have worked with Tom and gotten to know him. I hope to carry on and pass along his charateristics of patience and teaching of young engineers.

  18. I had the privilege of working with Tom at the Dominguez plant, from the late 1980’s to 1996. He was an inspiration to all of us, with his dedication to work, kindness to his coworkers, and above all, his commitment to doing the right thing, regardless of politics. I am a better person because of Tom. I am greatly saddened by his departure from his short life, and will truly miss him.

  19. Hi, Carol, I am one of the many engineers that was privileged to work with Tom during his time in the chemical industry at our Dominguez Hills site. I have thought of him often since his retirement and wondered what he was up to. Thanks for sharing that in his obituary. I am so sorry to hear of his passing. I know this is a difficult time for the family, and I will keep you in my prayers. Sincerely, Mary Brown

  20. I met Tom in Rhodia Dominguez plant in 1993. I flew in to LA from Houston to help resolve the issues with the quench tower. My first impression of Tom was very positive. Unlike some people at Rhodia, Tom did not have an agenda–he just wanted to get things done, politics aside. Tom must have liked my performance during the quench tower fix because I found myself managing the plant expansion project in Dominguez from 1994 to 1996. Those were the most memorable years I had with Tom. He helped me a lot with the project. We spent lot of hours in the plant from 7AM to 7PM and when dinner time came we, along with Carl, ended up most of the time in a family-owned Italian restaurant along Hawthorne Boulevard. This was his favorite restaurant. We used to go also to Anaheim to watch the Angels play. I am deeply saddened by his passing away. My deepest sympathy to you, Carol.

  21. I am deeply saddened to get this news. Carol, my thoughts and prayers are with you and the entire family. Tom was my first boss and hired me back in 1990. More than a boss he was a mentor and coach who helped me grow as a professional and person – more than I even appreciated at the time. Tom always took a keen interest in my personal life and rember our talks and his encouragement in the days I met my now wife of 13 years, Jennifer. As a Phillies fan, I miss our talks on baseball over lunch at Tom’s favorite – Nino’s on Long Beach Blvd – where the whole staff greeted him by name. I can’t express what a privelege it is to have been blessed with his friendship. I hope that Carol, and all his loved ones, find comfort amidst their loss.

  22. Carole, Im so sorry to hear of Tom’s passing. I have such fond memories of all the years we worked together. He used to lock his cigarettes in my desk drawer so he only had one when he was really desperate. It is hard to believe he had lung cancer… My best to you and your family. Mary Terry

  23. Carol and Family I was very sadden to hear of Tom’s passing. You and your family are in our prayers here at Dominguez. I’ve worked at the Dominguez plant since 1980 so I had the pleasure of working with Tom. My most pleasureable memory of Tom was at a company Safety dinner/dance when you and Tom were dancing with my daughter DeDee, trying to mimic her moves! We had a great night. My deepest sympathy to you and your family Zinda

  24. Carol, Tom was a good friend, excellent neighbor, one of faith, and most of all a caring soul. We will miss him, but he is now free and with us in spirit forever. – Also we will no longer worry about him washing the paint off of his beloved ‘truck’ with so many meticulous wash jobs. – You, Carol, have us standing always in support for you in spirit and body. God bless you for your loving care of Tom and for being the person you are. – Love, Carol and Woody

  25. Carol, I really got to know Tom better after Mike and I moved to AZ. We were able to visit more and get to know each other better. Tom was a good friend to both of us, and he will be missed. I know he is probably playing a game of chess with Mike right now. Love, Pat

  26. Dear Aunt Carol & Uncle Tom, As his niece Dorothy’s husband, I will always remember Uncle Tom as being a very good man and as such he will be missed. We are so sad that he has left and for you Aunt Carol I can’t begin to express how sorry I am for your loss. Speaking with Uncle Tom was always so easy. He was a soft spoken, highly intelligent man with the kindest demeanor. Ultimately, he was a true example of gentleman, deserving of emulation. God Bless You Uncle Tom Joseph Riggio

  27. I just heard of Tom’s passing and wanted to send my condolences to Carol. I only met Tom and Carol on one or two occasions about a dozen years ago, but always remembered what kind people and gracius hosts they were at a holiday party I attended at their home. I know that he will be missed by all of his family and friends.

  28. Dear Aunt Carol, My thoughts and prayers are always with you. Throughout Uncle Thomas’ illness you were a true fighter ”€ always there for him helping to make tough decisions, supporting and encouraging him when the future looked bleak, and trying to remain positive through it all. Even now you demonstrate a remarkable and impressive strength and I applaud you for that. You and Uncle Tom led a beautiful life together and have so many fond memories that you will have to cherish forever. Uncle Thomas will be greatly missed and there will always be a place for him in my heart. I am looking forward to seeing you soon. I love you. Dear Uncle Thomas, You and my dad were such opposites – how the two of you were raised in the same house baffles me to this day! I loved seeing you two together because although strikingly different, the brotherly bond you shared was great. I have always enjoyed our chats and appreciated your genuine interest in my life. You were a great man and led a successful, balanced, and loving life, and for that you and Aunt Carol should both be proud. I commemorate you for your courage throughout your illness and I know that you are in a peaceful place now. Thank you for being such a wonderful uncle and role model, I will miss you dearly and forever hold a place in my heart for you. I love you. Your niece Danielle

  29. Carol, I wanted to share my sincere condolences on Tom’s passing. While I only had the pleasure of meeting you both face to face one time, I immediately felt welcomed and at ease. During our periodic phone conversations, I was always struck by the courage and optimism that Tom conveyed regarding his illness. Tom was a very warm soul and I will miss him. Larry Newell

  30. Dear Uncle Thomas and Aunt Carol, As his nephew, I will always remember Uncle Thomas as being a man of honesty, integrity, kindness and wisdom. You were always very lovable towards me throughout my childhood and never ceased to give me advice in certain situations. I remember our long talks on the phone over baseball news and your interest in my new life at college. Your will to keep fighting throughout your illness was truly amazing. Thank you for being the perfect example of how an Uncle should be. I will miss you, I love you and you will forever hold a place in my heart. I would like to send my deepest condolences to my Aunt Carol. I know that the past few years have been incredibly difficult for you to deal with. Not many people have the mental strength to handle such problems but you did. I am always here for you and I am looking forward to seeing you once you come and visit in the spring. I love you. Your Nephew, John

  31. Dear Thomas, You made me feel welcomed from the first time we met and treated me and my family with warmth and kindness. Uncle Tom always remarked about how he enjoyed conversing with you, especially about the Mets. Nellie would always say how sweet you were especially when you raved about her calamari. Raymond mentioned the special Christmas invitations , Carols amazing cooking and your wonderful conversations. You had a way of making people feel special. No matter what the topic, you took the time to listen and respond with gentleness. Our entire family will remember you as the great communicator. Your calm manor, generous nature and honesty will always hold a special place in my heart. Thomas you are missed and loved. I know you are in a better place. My prayers and thoughts will always be with you. Rest in peace dear Thomas. Love your sister in law, Maureen Dear Carol, These last years have been very difficult for you. Being a caretaker is overwhelming. Thomas was very fortunate to have you as his wife and partner in life. Your love, dedication and perserverence shine. I can hear Thomas saying, “Thank you for all the Love and care Baby Doll”. Carol please remember our last conversation while in LA. You are never alone. You have your family here and are welcomed at any time. You are in my daily prayers for peace and comfort. You have my deepest sympathy. Love you, Maureen

  32. Dear Thomas, You are my only brother. Now that you have left, I feel a huge void. We haven’t been as close as brothers should be due to living on opposite coasts. However my thoughts and feelings of deep love for you my older brother whom I always looked up to will be in my heart forever. Anyone who ever knew you, especially in your early years was one of dedication to his school work which has been unequal in my experience. I recall when you attended high school and college. You sacrificed your weekends studying in your room until 4AM. All your hard work paid off when you graduated with honors from Poly Tech Institute. You went on to become very successful as a chemical engineer, moving into management and earning the respect of all your peers. Thomas you were a kind and gentle person with great determination and the will to succeed. Your great attribute of listening, never interrupting and truly understanding people made you a giant of a man and loved by all. Not a day goes by that I dont think of you and miss you. You are in my daily prayers. Love Brother Dear Carol, Thank you for being a life long loving partner and taking such wonderful care of my brother Thomas. With heart felt sympathy. Love you, Ted

  33. Carol, have tried to callyou and will try again. So sorry to learn about Tom, I had no idea that he had been suffering with lung cancer. Wish I had known sooner and could have been some comfort to you. (I don’t remember if you knew I was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer in ’98). Will try to phone you again. It has been so long and yet so much is still fresh in my “old” mind. Love, Marianne

  34. Mrs. DeMarinis. My condolence to you and your family. I am sorry to hear about Mr. DeMarinis. He was a very good person and you guys were great neighbors(especially for putting up with me). I am sure that the Lord has special plans for for him and that he is serving Him in another calling. God Bless and know that our prayers and love are with you in this trying time.

Sign the Guestbook, Light a Candle

Sign the Guestbook